Irony of Medication & Upped Zyprexa & Talked to Pdoc

My psych. dr (pdoc) finally called yesterday afternooon around 4:30. She said my choices were to go into the hospital, the psych ER, or up my Zyprexa. I chose upping my Zyprexa. That means I'm up to four 2.5 pills a day for a total of 10 mg. I took the extra pill this morning and so far I'm not extra sleepy. My hands feel numb, though, -buzzy- and yesterday, before the additional dose, my hands were shaking quite noticably. In fact, my 13-year-old daughter mentioned it. (This is likely due to the Topomax, not the Zyprexa.) At any rate, I told my dr. all about what I've been typing to you here. I guess it was good to be honest. I don't know what she thought- if it was all clinical. I would suppose it was.

Then this morning, my primary doctor's office called. Yesterday, I had had my yearly check-up. They checked various things, including my cholesterol, which of course, is very high, due, in part, to the Zyprexa. Zyprexa is known to raise triglyceries very high. Not to mention make you want to eat more! Of course, the answer to this was, "exercise and eat better". Hrumph! Suppose I have rather slacked off at the gym. But, I am here at the dr's to get two prescriptions- vitamin D and Fish Oil- to help with this, so that's at least something. I just picked them up and had to tell the pharmacist that I'm allergic to fish! My doctor should know this. Sheesh.

Hopefully, the dark thoughts will be pushed away by the higher Zyprexa dose. I told my psych. dr. on the phone yesterday that they had become harder and harder to push away. Maybe zyprexa will just numb all my thoughts. Ironic to ask for that maybe, but sometimes we have to take what we can get.