Anxiety (& Depression?)

I have had anxiety for weeks. I can't shake it. It's eating away. I snap at people. I scream. I can't seem to cry. I am nervous. And now finally I am having fantasies of drinking a ton and then of taking my entire bottle of anti-anxiety pills- many more than one month's worth. I can't explain it. I wish this feeling would go away. My medications have been taken. I want to beat people up. Outwardly, I seem ok unless I lose patience and then I snap. My therapist yesterday said I was anxious not depressed. She suggested soothing actives. Trust me I'm trying to do fun things! I need to escape this feeling. And it's Friday night. Not a good night to go to ER. I feel alienated that nobody can understand. Why did my therapist only say that? I am supposed to call if I'm worse. Can I make it through the weekend? Are my meds working? Lithium blood level was fine last time a few weeks back. I feel almost mean with lack of patience. Time is endless with this terrible feeling. Ill end up taking Ativan again most likely. I don't want to die. I just want to drink a bottle of whiskey and 50 Ativan and stay there.