Antipsychotics killing me!

I am so sick of this whole thing. I want off all psych drugs! They can treat me in the psych hospital but maintenance drugs? Nope. Im also sick of feeling inferior with my "bad brain". This is not who I was supposed to be! Sick! And I am more afraid of liver failure than I am of mania. But we are talking YEARS of cumulative damage!! The doctors tried not to scare me today but fatty liver has turned to some hardening! And they added STAT same DAY tests- ultrasound and another scan test. What's next? Cirrhosis- THAT'S what!