Im not sure if im manic or close to it. I am impulsive. Im getting a tattoo of a manic Mickey mouse soon. I started smoking to damage myself though ive since quit. The whole idea seemed wrong and a bit exciting. For two weeks at least ive felt ramped up. I had to take some ativan yesterday for it. I see my psych dr on thursday so we will see what she says. Maybe i am smoking to try to calm myself too. This aggitation is very uncomfortable. I have been watching "loveboat" at bedtime. It helps to calm me too.