Bipolar Biographies

Finished reading "Gorilla and the Bird" by Zach McDermott.  Very good descriptions of bipolar, especially how it feels to be manic- how out of control you can feel.  It's also about his mother and his childhood.  His mother always stopped what she was doing to come be with him, even if it meant buying an airplane ticket that same day.  Before that, I read "Madness" by Marya Hornbacher.  You really get the big picture of how it is to have bipolar disorder with this book.  Very visceral.   From a self-harm episode that went really wrong, to her drinking too much, and for both of them their hospitalizations and the wild rides that went along with being locked up- sometimes literally!  I'm about to start reading "Electro Boy" by Andy Behrman.  I remember that his mania was over-the-top like McDermott's, and it was almost scary to read.  I've seen interviews online of Behrman.  He's very awkward.  (He's not awkward in his book.)  There's also "Manic" by Terri Cheney, also great at getting across how it feels to be manic, but the way she writes kind of heightens the situations she's in.  Zach McDermott's descriptions of his episodes really make you feel as if you are there in person watching what he's describing.  After "Electro Boy" I think I might try "Haldol and Hyacinths: A Bipolar Life".  I didn't really like what she wrote about her life -the hyacinths part.  Then there's "An Unquiet Mind" by Kay Redfield Jamison. I didn't find it all that riveting It's very flat and she has this small obsession with lithium.  (I saw her in a movie about a couple of bipolar people who fall in love.  They go to a coffee shop and sort of interview Ms. Jamison.  Even then, she praises lithium!)  It's a very technical read.  Doesn't really draw me in like "Gorilla and the Bird" has. Compared to all of these people, I'm pretty boring.  I don't have ultradian cycling- that's several episodes a year.  I get episodes maybe once a year, and sometimes not even that.   If I find any more bipolar biographies, I'll be sure to update this post!

Yesterday

Ann Arbor preparatory choir - Yesterday 

This is my youngest child at age 8 rehearsing with the boy choir.  Photos by me.  (All my kids are grown now, hence the appropriateness of the song "Yesterday" with this video.)

New "All Creatures Great and Small" TV Series!

      Remember the series of books that, in America, started with "All Creatures Great and Small"?  Remember the 1970's TV series of the same name?  Well they're back!  PBS is showing Season 1 of "All Creatures Great and Small" 2021! January 10, 2021 will be the first episode's air date.  It is based on the much-beloved, never-out-of-print books. Season 1 has seven episodes.  There will be no bingeing, though, as we tune in each week at 9 p.m. One thing I find satisfying is that Siegfried is, in fact, tall!  The books describe him as tall and lanky- one thing that Robert Hardy was not in the first TV series, though he played him to perfection.  It will be interesting to see how closely they follow the books- what will they put in and what will they keep out?  How will this compare to the 1970's version of the show?

Only seven weeks to go!  Follow the links below for more on the show, including a video preview and who plays whom.

IMDB's page on the 2021 version of All Creatures Great and Small

PBS's page on All Creatures Great and Small, 2021

Prechter Research Program (e.g. Study I posted about yesterday)

 About the Prechter Program study I blogged about yesterday.  Much information at this site!

About the Prechter research program

"The Heinz C. Prechter Bipolar Research Program’s goals are to discover the fundamental biological changes that cause bipolar disorder and develop new interventions to treat and prevent the illness. This is done through the study of the longitudinal course of the illness in people who are diagnosed with bipolar. Research involves biology (including genetics), clinical, and environmental features. Bipolar disorder has a biological foundation, and is influenced by personal, social and environmental surroundings. An integrated research approach is needed in order to understand the individual with the disease.

"Bipolar disorder is an illness that has been with mankind since recorded history. Research is essential to both treat and prevent bipolar disorder in future generations. Prechter research emphasizes strategies to identify the illness at earlier stages of development, and among people with established bipolar disorder to test methods to predict emerging episodes of mania and depression. People with bipolar disorder do live productive lives, yet many suffer unnecessarily.

"Enormous progress has been made toward finding the answers to these fundamental questions in the field of neuroscience. Researchers at the Prechter Program, under the leadership of Melvin McInnis, M.D., are at the vanguard of the science of bipolar disorder."

After 12 years, study I'm in finds interesting info on bipolar

https://www.bphope.com/after-searching-12-years-for-bipolar-disorders-cause-team-concludes-it-has-many/?fbclid=IwAR2NvR6v9cLJ6Ez3zMUoeUwlsnC3CyweVfPTjgp3Lc2fyFoRS16zkHjePlI 

I have been in this study for the whole 12 years and counting.

After Searching 12 Years for the Cause of Bipolar Disorder, Team Concludes It Has Many

By bp Magazine

Last Updated: 21 Jan 2020

 126 COMMENTS

 

218,932 

VIEWS

Long-term study in more than 1,100 people yields a new seven-factor framework detailing the causes of bipolar disorder that could help patients, clinicians, and researchers.

ANN ARBOR, Mich. – Nearly 6 million Americans have bipolar disorder, and most have probably wondered why. After more than a decade of studying over 1,100 of them in-depth, a University of Michigan team has an answer – or rather, seven answers.

In fact, they say, no one genetic change, or chemical imbalance, or life event, lies at the heart of every case of the mental health condition once known as manic depression. Rather, every patient’s experience with bipolar disorder varies from that of others with the condition. But all of their experiences include features that fall into seven classes of phenotypes, or characteristics that can be observed, the team reports in a new paper in the International Journal of Epidemiology.

The team, from U-M’s Heinz C. Prechter Bipolar Research Program, collected and analyzed tens of thousands of data points over years about the genetics, emotions, life experiences, medical histories, motivations, diets, temperaments, sleep patterns and thought patterns of research volunteers. More than 730 had bipolar disorder, and 277 didn’t. Three-quarters of them are currently active research participants in the Longitudinal Study of Bipolar Disorder.

Using those findings, the team has developed a framework that could be useful to researchers studying the condition, clinical teams treating it, and patients experiencing it.  The team hopes it will give them all a common structure to use during studies, treatment decisions and more.

“There are many routes to this disease, and many routes through it,” says Melvin McInnis, M.D., lead author of the new paper and head of the program based at the  U-M Depression Center. “We have found that there are many biological mechanisms which drive the disease, and many interactive external influences on it. All of these elements combine to affect the disease as patients experience it.”

The Prechter program, funded by gifts from many donors, is named for a late Detroit automotive pioneer who fought bipolar even as he built a successful business. Long-term funding from this program has made it possible to build a massive library of data from the “Prechter cohort” of patients, which is two-thirds female, and 79 percent white, with an average age at enrollment in the study of 38 years. On average, participants had had their first depressive or manic episode when they were 17, and many had other mental health conditions.

Seven Classes and the Key Findings That Shaped Them

The seven phenoclasses, as the U-M team has dubbed them, include standard measures doctors already use to diagnose and track the progress of bipolar disorder.  In addition, they include:

• Changes in cognition, which includes thinking, reasoning, and emotion processing;

• Psychological dimensions such as personality and temperament;

• Measures of behaviors related to substance use or abuse – called motivated behaviors;

• Aspects of the person’s life story involving family and intimate relationships and traumas;

• Patterns of sleep and circadian rhythms; and

• Measures of how patients’ symptoms change over time and respond to treatment.

Some of the Key Findings Made in the Prechter Cohort by the U-M Team Include:

• Migraine headaches are three and a half times more common among people with bipolar disorder than those without. Eating disorders, anxiety disorders and alcohol problems are also more common in those with bipolar, as is metabolic syndrome.

• More people with bipolar disorder have a history of childhood trauma than those without the condition, it is associated with changes in self-control and attention.

• People with bipolar disorder had higher levels of saturated fats in their diets, and the research also found associations between levels of certain fat molecules in the blood of patients and their mood or level of symptoms.

• Looking at the microbes living in the gastrointestinal tracts of patients and comparison volunteers, the researchers found lower levels of a key bacteria type, and less diversity of microbes in patients taking antipsychotic medications.

• Poor sleep appears to play a key role in bipolar disorder, with links found to severity of depression and mania in female, but not male, participants with the condition. Other gender differences also emerged in other aspects of the study.

• People with bipolar disorder who have a strong neurotic tendency in their personalities are more likely to have a severe illness, especially among men.

• A range of cognitive abilities – including memory, executive functioning, and motor skills – were poorer in participants with bipolar than those without, in general. The study found a particular link between the cognitive abilities of people who carried a particular genetic trait and were taking newer antipsychotic medicines.

• Two genes, called CACNA1 and ANK3, appear to play a role in susceptibility to developing bipolar disorder. But many genetic variations have been found to be associated with bipolar risk, and more recent findings have explored the role of having a mix of these variations in the chances a person will develop bipolar.

• Stem cells grown from skin samples taken from participants, and then coaxed to grow into nerve cells called neurons, have proven useful in studying cellular aspects of bipolar disorder. For instance, neurons derived from bipolar patients’ cells were more excitable than comparisons – but calmed down when exposed to lithium, a common treatment for bipolar. Also, the cells show differences in how they interact and function.

• Key features of speech patterns predict mood states and may be useful outcomes measures to predict the need for intervention to prevent episodes of mania or depression.

Even though bipolar disorder tends to run in families, the long-term study has revealed no one gene that ‘carries the day’ to explain it, says McInnis, who is the Woodworth Professor of Bipolar Disorder and Depression in the U-M Medical School’s Department of Psychiatry.

“If there was a gene with a strong effect like what we see in breast cancer, for instance, we would have found it,” he explains. “We hope this new framework will provide a new approach to understand this disorder, and other complex diseases, by developing models that can guide a management strategy for clinicians and patients, and give researchers consistent variables to measure and assess.”

He adds, “Bipolar disorder has a lot to teach humankind about other illnesses because it covers the breadths of human mood, emotion, and behavior like no other condition. What we can learn in bipolar about all these factors will be directly applicable to monitoring other disorders, and personalizing the approach to managing them.”

The Prechter Bipolar Research Program is still recruiting participants for its long-term study, and accepting donations from those who want to help the research move forward. More information is available at http://www.prechterprogram.org.

Rambling Thoughts About Early Bipolar

 Re-reading "Madness" by Marya Hornbacher.  I'm about 1/4 of the way through.  Seems that her episodes are a lot worse than most people's- but hers started in early childhood- about age 4.  I don't remember having any bipolar symptoms before age 16- EXCEPT for hearing voices at night.  Might be those hypnogogic hallucinations - I heard my sister calling my name.  Or at least, I thought it was my sister.  I would go into fits of rage screaming at the top of my lungs toward adults when I was 15 -17.  People assumed I was just being a teenager.  Maybe I was.  I know I had depression symptoms at age 20   I'd run away and hide- I once left work during out lunch break  and drove down the street to the mall and just sat there in the middle of the mall eating my lunch among the people who were walking by.  I was glad nobody knew where I was. I felt safe that way.  I've also hidden under the bathroom sink trying to be all by myself where nobody could find me.  I did this as a kid, too.  I hid behind a book case in preschool.  They found me and tried to coax me out.  At age 8, I hid under/behind the winter coats in our classroom in 2nd grade.  I felt safe in there.  Which of these are bipolar type things and which are merely age-appropriate coping techniques I don't know.  I certainly never had DBT back then.  Now, I don't feel the need to hide, but it reminds me of my mom's dog that hides in a small closet or the downstairs bathroom -no windows in either.  The depressions stayed with me especially during pregnancy and post-partum.  I'd go catatonic sometimes.  Staring blankly at the wall for ages at a time, staying in my room for hours.  By 30 I was singing along with music in my earphones, riding my bike blasting away at the top of my lungs!  I don't recall being as intense as Marya Hornbacher as a kid.  I've always thought of myself as rather mild-mannered.  My friend Caleb says I am afraid of conflict.  Probably stems from having grown up in an alcoholic household.  I thought everything was great when I was growing up, but it wasn't.  Took me years to figure this out.  So it's a mish mosh of experiences.  I have always been extremely creative, seeing "little worlds" and details in everything- a keen insight into the world.  Intense curiosity.  I consider my early childhood to be pretty normal.  It's when I went through puberty that things started to change- part hormones part bipolar.   

Physical Update

 Two days ago, I went to my doctor for my annual check up.  My doctor did a full work up including a blood work.  I've lost 20 pounds since last year's appointment.  I still need to lose more.  I'll have to go to the mall to walk this winter.  BUT, my weight is holding nicely since about June.  My (vitamin) B12 level is too high.  No wonder- the supplement I was taking has ten THOUSAND times the suggested daily amount of B12 in it! My A1C is 5.3 and they like it under 5.5 for a non-diabetic.  My kidney function is sub-par.  Don't know any more than that.  I don't know what you do about that.  I have three pills of the many that I'm taking that I need to discontinue: Vitamin E (which was for my liver) but my liver results were good!  Amlodipine- I need to stop, too.  I looked it up and it's for blood pressure.  My blood pressure had been very high, but now it's normal so I guess that's why she discontinued it.  I also am to stop Metformin because there is a recall because it can contain N-Nitrosodimethylamine (NDMA) which has been shown to cause cancer!  I need to repeat my blood pressure being taken and my labs in three weeks.  My liver levels were normal!  This all encourages me to continue losing weight.

Talking with the Kids and Amazon Prime Shows

 I just ran into one of my milk crate full of records with my pinkie toe.  OUCH.  It recovered just fine but that initial ouch isn't fun.

I called N1 and N3 tonight.  (I think it's a little late to call N2.)  N3 was telling me about how he does calculus online.  Apparently, you type a series of characters to make a math symbol.  And the computer corrects your problems after you submit each one.  If you're taking a quiz you can change it X number of times but if its an exam, you can only change it twice and then it locks you out.  He was also telling me about his biology class.  Lots to memorize he says.  N1 told me about computer games that use artificial intelligence.  I was telling her about the shows I've been watching.  One is called "Upload" about uploading people's beings into an electronic avatar and people are assigned to watched them from earth via computers.   The two main characters fall in love- one human and one avatar.  I finished watched all of season 1 and there is probably going to be a season 2 but not until 2021.  Also, N1 and I discussed going to the doctor because I have my annual appointment on Monday.  We were talking about getting vaccines.  She relayed a story about when she was young and we were at the doctor for her annual appointment and she decided to be stoic and get the shot and after that I said that we could go out to eat as a treat because of how well she did and that she could pick the place.  I love that the kids relay their memories with me. Did not talk with N2 because by the time I was off the phone with the other two, it was nearly 10 and I think that's too late to call someone, unless they're in an earlier time zone.

I did laundry today.  There are three washers and three dryers downstairs on the lowest level.  I put my laundry in the washer and set an alarm for when it should be done.  (The machine has a count down.)  When I came back, all three dryers were in use.  They have timers, too, so I set my alarm for 20 minutes because one of them had 15 minutes left on it.  When I went down again, there were a few people in there just about to leave, so I got to use a dryer.  It takes 30 minutes for the washers and 60 minutes for the dryers.  I set an alarm on my phone so I get down there again relatively close to when the machines are done.  It costs $1.75 per wash/dry.  So that's $3.50  per load.  I do take my laundry to my mom's sometimes, but that's a long time to be over there.

I am enjoying my new apartment.  Its been a couple weeks since I've swept, mopped and vacuumed the floors.  I will do that tomorrow.  I've been here 5 weeks as of today.  I should also go to the grocery store to get a few items.  I try to use the twenty-items-max check outs because there isn't usually a line on the left side.  The right side always has a line and all the regular lanes have a long line down an aisle that is perpendicular to the line of checkout lanes.  The left side, however, doesn't usually have a line and if they do, it goes quickly and is shorter than the right side.  I brought my chairs and table in from the balcony because they were fixing them all week.  Today was the last day they were going to be here.  I'd put the furniture back out there, but I'm waiting for my colorful lights to show up and I want room to stand while putting the strand around the railing.  I should clear off the dining room table.  Its covered in notes and bills.  Luckily, only one hasn't been paid.  It's going to go through automatically later in the month, but I could call and pay it early if I wanted to.  I took out the trash today, too.  

I've been eating a lot lately.  Not huge amounts, but frequently.  I get hungry about every 2 to 3 hours.  And Whole Foods has stopped carrying my dried seaweed that I like.  I should start keeping track of what I'm eating, again.  I have gained maybe 4 pounds since I moved here.  That's a lot of excess calories!  The weather was nice today.  I should've gone for a walk.  Maybe if it's warm again tomorrow I will walk.  But, I'm still at about a 40 pound loss.  I hope my doctor notices on Monday.  I think I need to lose another 40.

I changed my "theme"/background.  It's very pink! Let me know if you like it.