Anxiety again- Hard Help and Warm Hugs

I'm feeling very anxious the last two days. I'm trying to use coping skills rather than depend on Ativan or Benedryl but its difficult. I will say that I have seen my new pdoc's office and it was okay. I see her again in January. I called the help line they gave me a number for and they've actually followed up and called to find out how I'm doing! I like that. So the rules have changed. I no longer call psych. ER unless something terrible happens, I suppose. If I just need a chat about anxiety or wanting to OD or the like I can call this number. I still think there is too much time between now and when I see someone again. I actually see my old pdoc on the 8th. I am looking forward to seeing if we can actually fix some of this stuff in my life!! I have been trying really hard to keep an even mood so that I don't have to be seen in the ER. This number I called is a nice interim place. Right now, I'm out with my friend, K, sitting at Starbucks. We're going to go out to eat here in a few minutes when he gets something done on his other computer. Part of me is afraid of going back to the place I was at in November. I'd rather go to the psych hospital. The other place is supposed to be more low-key, but there was nothing to do there. The hospital gives you a schedule of classes to go to. Lately, I feel so judged. I feel depressed and lost, basically. I am supposed to be enjoying my time with K so I shouldn't really dwell too much here. Dinner will help as I haven't eaten all day and its getting on in the afternoon. The people from the new place are supposed to call me later today. That will be nice. I need someone to talk to. Even my bulletin board I usually post on isn't helping very much. I feel judged there too. I need hard help and warm hugs.