The Road to Mania Part 2

Continued...

9-12-12

I dunno if it will help. :/ I dunno if I didn't make this all up.

Still up. If I turn off the tv I'll just be restless. T always said that having tv on keeps you up. Staring at the dark is boring!

Texting about buying a tank for my son.

So just a med adjustment ??? I took my meds tonight...

Awake. Headache.

Yes the water was pleasureful.

I'm still researching the tanks. It would cost me at least 100$ to set it up plus the fish. I'd need sand too.

I think I might stay up all night. My head hurts but is getting better. Watching tv.

I actually slept. Going back. Feel good except I woke up holding my cpap mask. Oops

9-13-12

Irritated at idiot. Saw regular dr about ER. That was stupid. Asked me stupid questions and wasted my time. Stupid asshole.

I can't decide whether or not to call pdoc.

I am tired but I can't stop going. Irritated by fork scraping noise in the next room....

Tomorrow is Friday.

Heart pounding. Need to buy food for cat. Maybe I can takey youngest out to do that in an hour or so.

I got the cat food. He is good for a month now. Vi bought the rest of that type of food. Lol. What was that saying? Lol Everybody irritates me. The people at the store were in my way and too slow. I want there to be one person in the store- and that one person to serve me.

I can't be bothered to finish even a piece of cheese. Lol

Mixed usually feels like I need to jump outta my skin. I'm really racing right now. Surprised I can wait for this iPods slow typing.

Ok gotta move. Sitting here isn't working.

Went on another walk. I might crash...

I was reading online. Sounds like mania.

My head hurts and my body is exhausted although my mind still races. I'm in my room in bed with the tv on.Still in my room. Head hurts.

I sent my notes of how I've been feeling to my friend. He said I'm manic.

Someone else blocked me in fb because I made an anatomical comparison. Shows you that people take things too personally. I have a headache and I'm still up. No friends left except on here. Another friend gone....

Geeze another friend gone...Now I'm crying

He says I worry too much. I only started worrying tonight.

Feel better from the conversation but my head still hurts. I'll see what pdoc has to say- if she calls back before 5.

9-14-12

Up early.

I called. The person on the phone said shed mark it a high priority. The nurse called me. Waiting on pdoc to call.

Hungry! Maybe I should do something about that.

Still waiting! Out at lunch. No sympathy or patience for anyone. Bouncy bouncy.... I am thinking I'm no different . So I don't need meds. I want to be a natural me. I was ok before. I was. I'm sitting n talking to friends ok.

I feel ok now.

I think I can do this.

Nothing bothers me. This is great.

Stuff smells off though. Yuck. Could barely eat lunch.

She hasn't called back.

Three hours left for her to call back.

I feel fine. Going to the movies soon.

She called. Doesn't think it's mania. Wants me to double Zyprexa for the weekend. Ugh. I will be a zombie.

I think I've made a mistake in telling her. I feel fine. Nobody close to me has said anything.

Continued in Part 3... CONTINUED in part 3....