Zyprexa is a hard beast to give up

Where are my keys? Oh they're there in my purse. Where is my purse? Oh its there on the backseat of the car. Where are my keys? Oh they're in my purse. Where are my keys? Better make sure they're in my purse. Someone is following me. Everywhere. I just started this piece of music but already I wish it were over. I just started this reading in church but is it over yet? Where'd I park my car? If I can't find it, nobody can help me!! I just sat down to this book; is it over yet?

These are some of the things my mind has been doing lately. I told my nurse practitioner and her nurse said she wants to UP my zyprexa. (We're trying to go down.) Down doesn't seem to be going very well. I feel this constant sense of anxiety- of vibrating urgency. Its as if my body doesn't want to give up the zyprexa. So up we go again. I'm waiting for her to call back actually, so see what she actually says. The last plan was to stay at 7.5 mg and reduce as I see fit. Now I'm at 10 mg (according to her nurse) for two weeks. Or maybe longer. I do NP on April 10th. I'll come back after NP calls me this afternoon.

EDIT: NP never called back. But her nurse said to stay on 10 mg of Zyprexa and that NP will call me some time this week. Oh- and I have now lost 20 pounds. Still going to the gym twice a week and trying to walk 6,000 steps on days in between.